I wouldn't have worked this hard if i knew this is what i'll get as repay. I've worked damn hard for this cca. That i stayed back everyday to train till 7 during the competition period. I could have save my time by studying at home, playing at home, resting at home and do not need to sleep past midnight so that i get my sleep after doing all my homework. Maybe i've made the wrong choice and the biggest mistake on earth to spend so much time on it, okay maybe not the time but its the effort. The effort, get it? Trying to gather the gals to have afternoon drill so that our drills are of tip-top standard during the competition. And what did i get back as repay? Officers thinking i have the wrong attitude and asked to watch my attitude, thinking that if im not suitable to be DI this year, not letting us to access drill. Sometimes, i really think why have i put in so much effort when i know that no one would appreciate it. Working so hard and this is what i got back. Walking away when commander was teaching, hahhahahahahahah i hardly leave the contingent even when i was needed to. So i was blamed and taken off responsibilities for the things that i had not done. And after competition, i still have as much cca trainings as before. Maybe i just have to watch my attitude and shan't work so hard since thats what i got back. Im serious. i mean whats the point? u work this hard, no one notices and u dun work as hard, u get the same thing. So whats the point?

Labels: feeling confused